The Mighty Viking

When I lay down to sleep, I plan on a future in the morning. When I begin a journey, I plan on a future destination. I work for a future of food, of shelter, safety, and if I‘m lucky, future freedom to amuse myself.

And these things, in their time, are good things. Dreaming of our future can bring us joy.

But, we can only dream of our future in the present. Indeed, there is nothing we can do outside of this moment.

But for some reason, we spend an inordinate amount of time with thoughts of the future filling up our awareness. Sometimes it‘s because we‘re dwelling on the mistakes of the past, and hoping to make something better out of them. Sometimes we‘re worried about the wrongs of others, and our fears of what might have been, and we conjure up dark fantasies of what might be, if!

But this moment right here is where things work. This moment right here, this is the world of verbs, of action for better or worse. Playing the future is a chess game against an unseen, unknown opponent. The past is the realm of the dead.

And yet, when I sit quietly by this fire, feeling the warmth and life of these two dogs beside me, and listen close to the thunderous sound of my inner thoughts, I hear myself attending almost entirely on precisely that which I cannot address in the present.

And thus, my present becomes a swamp of lies, fears, and fantasies. And the present is left to fend for itself, to become tomorrow‘s lies and failures of the past.

There is a time to think of the future, and a time to study the past. But inside each present task, each present moment, is a gift to be opened, cherished, and to be grateful for. For now, this very moment, I will practice just being in this sphere of Present. Here my senses are at their best. I cannot hear the future. The future has no touch.

So I will feel these dogs, and the warmth from the fire. I will be grateful for the crisp night air, and hear the night sounds as if they were a part of me. I will set aside the intrusions to my experience of the Now.

Now is the time for fighting. Now is the time for loving. Now is the time for healing.

Now is the only thing I truly have.

Tonight‘s Viking Sacrifice:

The Dragon of Self-judgement.

We hear these days a lot about being patient with oneself, admonished to be kind, and accept who and what we are.

Of course, this drives others absolutely piffy. The hard-chargers amongst us, the driven and sometimes obsessive people hate the notion of accepting what we have, and who we are, refuse to believe that this is the best we can be.

And the twain ne‘er shall meet, it seems. The two principles: acceptance and the pursuit of excellence in our personal lives seems at odds with one another.

But I think perhaps I see how these two conflicting ideals can coexist peacefully. Stay with me here:

Patience isn’t acceptance of the imperfect. It’s recognition of the difference between the person and the deed. Between the result and the intent. Between spirit and body. Be kind to one, push the other to be better.

See? Now isn‘t that easy? Now stop warring with yourself. No more of those shenanigans.

This dragon who demands of us that we constantly assault our own humanity… is Sacrificed.

AA